ihave to fake date with a nub
by SupButterCup
Summary: Freddie and Sam have to fake date in front of his mom. So basically they have to make out every time Mrs. Benson shows up. But will it get more serious? I don't know I haven't finished writing it.
1. Can't be named

**So my last sto**ry '**iHeard you haven't kissed anyone' was definitely by far the funnest to write, so even though I haven't gotten many reviews it was my favorite of what I wrote. So give me your ideas for something like that that you want me to write about. **

Sam's POV

Oh. My. God. So right now I am kissing Freddie, because we are just getting it over with. He slightly depend the kiss, I didn't argue with that deepening. Wow probably 5 more seconds went by but it felt like forever.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHH" Freddie's mom screamed as she saw me and Freddie kissing, I can milk this cow he calls mom.

"Uh mom, I was just uh, me and Sam were uh," He stumbled out making hand motions.

"We we just kissing, me and the dork are in love!" I said in a bad acting voice, Freddie held back laughter but Mrs. Benson took it seriously. She started to flip out, I had to turn away to muffle my laughter.

"GET OUT!" She yelled pointing to the exit.

"No I can't leave, I am meant to be here." To finish off, I grabbed Freddie and began (fake) passionately kissing, that made Mrs. Benson freak out! She yelled and flipped out. "Just play along with it and I will owe you big time, plus it hilarious." I whispered into Freddie's ear.

"Fine, but you owe me, big time." He whispered. "I will play along but it better be worth it." For affect he deepened the kiss enough for Mrs. Benson to see. I moaned and opened my eyes Freddie's mom was about to pass out. My phone vibrated, it was Carly.

"Hello?" I asked into the phone.

"Sam where are you?" Carly asked. I completely forgot about iCarly. "It's been like fifteen minutes." Wow I have been making out with Freddie for that long?

"Sorry, I'll be right over." I hung up the phone. "Congrats Mrs. Benson, I have to go. I have something very important to take care of so bye." I said cheerfully and gave Freddie a peck on the lips lightly smacked his face and got off of him, when did I get on?

I left and Mrs. Benson looked like she saw her parents in bed together. "Samantha I swear if I see you with Freddie again…" She called after me but I left before she finished. I texted him to play along more because the next couple of months would be fun. I also told him to change his cell phone wallpaper to me and put me on speed dial 1. I also told him that if we don't continue to do this that he would get in way more trouble about lying. So every time we see his mom we have to make it real. It was more for my benefit.

"Honey I'm home!" I said when I entered the Shay's apartment.

"Sam where were you? You were gone for like ever." Carly said standing up off of the couch. "Why is your hair messed up like that?" She asked I guess Freddie ran his fingers through my hair like I did with his. I fixed it and shrugged. "Were you at Freddie's?"

"yeah why?" I asked nervously. Carly just gave me a look. "We-" I was interrupted. Freddie ran in and slammed the door behind him.

"She's coming!" Freddie yelled. I jumped onto him and we started making out on the couch. "Carly we are doing this to piss off my mom, go along with it." Freddie said and Carly just nodded with her mouth still hanging open. I opened my mouth and pushed my jaw shut so she jot the picture.

"You too honey." She stumbled referring to me and Freddie.

"STOP IT NOW!!!" Mrs. Benson yelled and tried to pull me off of him but she wasn't strong enough. "Freddie you were such a good boy." She pleated. "Then you started hanging out with HER and you changed." I laughed into his lips. "how long has it been like this?" She asked Carly. I gave her a signal to work it.

"Oh, um, psh, like, uh, long, long time." Carly said changing her tone with every word. Yeah like that's not a big give away.

"Fine, be that way!" Mrs. Benson said leaving; I got off of Freddie breathing heavily.

"What is going on?" Carly yelled. "Ok I thought no I know that you guys hate each other and every time Mrs. Benson comes in you guys have to tongue wrestle?" She flipped out.

"Ha, tongue wrestle that's funny." I said quietly.

"So how long is this going to go on?" She asked.

"Until Freddie's mom gets in the hospital." I said Freddie just got wide eyed.

"What's going on in here?" Spencer asked looking at Freddie's arm around me and our heavy breathing.

"They have to fake date whenever Mrs. Benson is around." Carly said and Spencer just backed up and went back upstairs.

(the next day at school)

"So then she slammed that girl into the wall and continued to pound on…" I was talking to Wendy about Shelby Marxx new fight.

"Sam! Mrs. Benson!" Carly warned me. I saw Freddie heading out of the AV room. I ran over to him leaving Wendy very confused. He was talking to one of his nerd friends and I interrupted their conversation.

"Freddie! Your mom! Here now!" I said he grabbed my waist and pulled me in for a kiss. He dropped the cord he was holding.

"Jezz Freddie, make out on your on time, not mine." His nerd friend said I waved him off, he picked up the cord and walked away.

"Even here Freddie! Really!" Mrs. Benson said. People started to stare. Crap I forgot about the gossipy bitches. "Well I know when I'm not wanted!" She yelled and just stood there, expecting someone to ask her to stay.

"No, you don't, this is school, for kids, go!" I said with Freddie's arms still around my waist and mine around his neck. "Go on, go." I waved her off as well. We looked around the corner 'til she was gone we let go of each other. "Try to make it more realistic next time!" I yelled.

"Wow sorry, I am such a pro at lying to my mom!" sarcasm was eating him alive. The bell rung and I had to go to English he had to go to? "I gotta get to math." He said and we walked to our classes.

**This is not over I sure hope you like this story cause I worked my ass off to write it and get close to what I wanted. So review, and the funniest thing happened! I recorded iSaved your life and was about to watch it when I read the summary. Freddy they misspelled Freddie! **


	2. What are we and Little shop of horrors

**So thanks for the great reviews! Um, this will be Sam's POV unless noted otherwise. So enjoy…**

So for the past week Freddie's mom has been hovering over me and Freddie like something that hovers over something, uh wow. I also had to sit with him in every class.

Freddie handed me a note. _Mom alert. _It read Freddie put his arm around me and I rested my head on his shoulder. It's been the weirdest week ever, in a way that makes me burn inside, like a pain that I don't want to go away. Oh my god I am becoming emo!

"Where's your mom?" I asked in a tone that shouldn't be messed with.

"She walked away, but she will come back." He said. "She has been wondering why we don't hang out with each other outside of school and iCarly."

"What are the iCarly users going to think? I mean what if your mom decides to lend us a visit when we are filming?" I asked him, we had to be quiet because we were supposed to be learning about history, or math or English.

"Well even if she does come in or decide to watch the show, she should know that we are filming and that we are not going to make out every time she sees us." He whispered.

"But we already do that." I said, even though I couldn't see his face, I knew the look he was mentally giving me. "We make out every time she sees us."

"You don't like it?" he asked playfully.

"Hey who said that, but you need work." I said.

"Hey we are not really dating so this is like practice."

"Whatever, but really, you could do better, put your all into it. Because I am so worth it, and those who give, need to give more, and then we shall talk about them receiving anything." I said somewhat seriously. He rolled his eyes and out of my eye I saw a Mrs. Benson taking pictures of me and Freddie. She was going to study every detail until she got proof that we weren't dating.

"Freddie your mom is a freak." I said sitting up and looking at her.

"You don't have to live with her." He said sliding down into his chair. I didn't talk to him for the next half hour of class. I thought of how long is this going to go on? Will my emoness become serious? What will it be like after we aren't not together anymore?

"So what's up with your mom?" I asked him, we had to hold hands for effect. I swung my arm like the couples in those movies before one of them breaks up with another. It wasn't like the 'stand around the circle I really don't want to hold your hand' hold our fingers were intertwined with each others.

"Like I said, she thinks that we aren't really dating." He said.

"Well, I don't either, I think of it as more like 'friends with strong benefits' ya know." I said. He nodded and the bell rung.

"I got history." I said as the same time he said, "I have algebra." Then something really weird happened. When I let go of his hand, I felt cold, not like my hand being cold because he provided warmth, but like mentally cold like I wanted the burn to come back. I gave him a quick wave and went off to class, I was hungry.

(At lunch)

I got in line for lunch and got right back out.

"Freddie I need money." I said in the sweetest voice possible. "Can you lend slash give slash pay completely like a good boyfriend would do?" I said and held out my hand for cash.

"Sam remember when our Music teacher got that tic and we had to watch that movie-" He started.

"NO! DON'T GET THOSE SONGS STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN!!" I yelled at him. _Little shop little shop of horrors. Little shop little shop of terrors no oh oh oh nooooo._ The song buzzed in my mind.

"In Seymour's words, you have bled me dry." He said he said.

"You can do it! Cause if you feed me Freddie I will grow up big and strong!" I sang to him laughing, Carly was there the whole time and was on the verge of tears laughing. "So feed me."

"Carly do you have any blood you can lend me for Audrey II over here?" he said pointing to me.

"Sure, why don't you give it to the dentist?" Uh Carly and her sad, sad jokes. She handed Freddie a ten and we got in line.

**So you might not get the jokes if you haven't seen Little Shop of Horrors, because we watched it in music today and the tunes haunt you and every time you think of it everyone around you with eventually hear you humming the tune and say GET THAT FRIGGEN AWSOME SONG OUT OF MY HEAD! Because the other class was jealous of us for seeing it.**


	3. Movies

**Sorry this may not be as funny but my grandfather died yesterday. So take it easy on me.**

"Hey." Freddie said holding up a dvd. We were in blockbuster to get dvds for a fake movie date. He showed me the movie, Little shop of Horrors.

"I don't think so." I said grabbing the dvd from his hand and putting it back on the shelf. "What about," I started scanning the shelf of movies. "Um, a bug's life." I said holding it up."I love this movie."

"Um, sure I guess." He got the dvd and we headed for his place. He put in the disc to his blu- ray player and pressed play on the dvd menu.

"Why do you like this movie? I mean you said that you said that you hated dingo movies." He said he had his arm around my shoulder by habit I rested my on her shoulder.

"Well it's the only memory I have of my dad. Before he left, he watched this movie with me and I have loved it ever since." I said, he looked at me with a concerned face.

"I really don't know how to respond to that type of thing from you." He told me.

"Yeah it's a cute movie." I said curling into a ball on the couch still leaning against him.

"Sam, Sam? Are you up?" I opened my eyes to find Freddie shaking me awake.

"No." I answered closing my eyes again and shooing him off.

"Come on Sam my mom will be home soon." He said I sat up and stretched.

"Chill your grill, when did the movie end?" I asked pointing to the tv.

"About 5 minutes ago, I woke you up because I knew my mom would be home." He said.

"Well it's not like I have to leave right, I mean aren't we doing this to make your mom mad?" I said, I totally forgot why we were doing this. At first it was just to ya know help him out but really why?

"I don't even know why. All I know is that when certain people are around we have to make out." He said.

"I don't even see half of the people." I told him honestly, most of the time when he says his mom is looking I don't even see her.

"Same, I mean but what are we doing?" He asked. "Really Sam it's not like we really needed a reason to do this."

"I know, now that I think of it, we could have just told her that we broke up after she caught us." I said looking at him with a somewhat pouty face. No sticking out my lower lip but I did the eyes.

"Yeah, well I guess…" He was interrupted by the power going out.

"Really! It's not even raining, there are no types or storms, the only other way the power could go out is that Lewbert shut off… the power." I yelled and then sighed. "So what were you going to say?"

**Sorry that was short. But it was somewhat of a cliff hanger.**


	4. Power out

**I might not be updating this weekend (funeral stuff) **** so enjoy this and yeah.**

Freddie's POV

"Well I was gonna say-" I was interrupted by Sam's phone.

"Hey Carly." She said pointing at me for 'one minute'. "Yeah I am at Freddie's. Yeah it is. No way? That is so weird. Well I have to go my battery is dying. See ya later." She hung up the phone. "Carly said that a tree fell on the wires outside and killed the power." She said inching towards me so slightly that she might not have noticed she did.

"Can I finish?" I asked getting slightly annoyed. She shrugged. "OK so… well that's just great!" I said because I completely forgot what I was gonna say. "Well we are stuck here for the night. So you can go on my bed and I can sleep in my mom's room." I said getting off the couch.

"No I'm too comfy." She said lying down I got her a couple of blankets and came back and she was asleep."Freddie." She said lifting up her head. "Don't go, I-I…" She couldn't finish it she was already asleep and couldn't answer me. You may think I am like oh my god what is she gonna say, but no. Sam has done this to me all the time, whether it's for food or that's it. She sat up quickly. "OK Freddie get me ham! I mean meet and umm… pads?" She said.

"Shit Sam." I said leaning my head back.

"Don't worry I haven't bleed onto the couch, but I might unless you don't go and get me ham and pads." She said harshly.

"Ok we have ham in the fridge and you can explore my mom's bathroom for your necessities because there is no chance in hell, I will look for them." I said going into the kitchen for the ham while Sam did her thang in the bathroom.

"Ok I am set." She said clapping her hands coming out of the bathroom.

"You are giving me a little too much information." I said handing her the plate of ham.

"Well Mr. I am giving my girlfriend lip, why don't you be a good little boy and get me a peppy cola." She said patting me on the head.

"We are technically not dating or boyfriend and girlfriend so don't pull that card on me." I stated, she narrowed her eyes and then smirked.

"Wow, are you actually are giving me lip." She said pinching my arm, but it didn't hurt because I have gotten stronger. But her face softened and she had this weird look on her face, not like oh my god I totally love you now look, but more of an we are friends now look.

"Are you ok? I think your time of the month is making you acted up." I said guiding her to a seat. She started laughing. "What? Are you ok? Something is up…" I said raising an eyebrow.

"Freddie you are such an idiot." She said she leaned closer to me, I know what is coming. I leaned in as well and just as our faces were inches away her phone rang there was an odd ringtone; it was a quiet alarm like the ones on fire trucks.

She answered the phone but her hand shook. "Hi mom." She said answering the phone her voice was normal but her expression on her face was nervous."Yeah, well I am kind of locked in, I will be back when the power is back on. Yeah I will." She hung up the phone and sighed.

"Is everything ok?" I asked she put her head on my shoulder.

"Yeah, it's just my mom is in a slump because we are out of food and I have to pick her up some food. I do it every three days so basic stuff. It just makes me want me to be more supportive to her, I mean she has never had a serious relationship in like forever, and she doesn't have a real job, we can barely afford food. She totally splurged on me when she got me a phone, and she has to pay for the bill every month. I just want to help her." She said sighing she was definitely half asleep because she kept going on and on.

"Why don't you get a job you like, er something." I said putting my harm around her and rubbed her arm for comforting her. "Ya know you could get a job testing new ice cream flavors." I said smiling.

"I would take that job in a heartbeat if it was available." She said lifting up her head and giving me a peck on the check I responded by kissing her on the lips, not just a peck but passionately, she responded back. Quite ironically the power came back on when we parted.

"So I guess you have to go home now…" I said looking away from her but then back.

"Yeah, but can you come with me to the store?" She asked hopefully.

"Sure lets go." I grabbed my keys and she grabbed her jacket and I followed her out the door.

**Wow that took me forever to write. So review (and tell me what you like and what not I want suggestions)**


	5. walk

Freddie's POV

"Hey Sam?" I asked when we were walking to Mallmart. "What happened to your dad?" I asked my voice cracked a little when I talked.

"Well… He left and then Melanie, yes she is real, got into this big fancy school and he came back. I thought everything was dandy then he and my mom went out, and he didn't come back." She said sadly. I took her hand and squeezed it for comfort. "I have gotten over it, but my mom just dates these assholes and and they take stuff, we weren't a total deadbeat family until she started dating these awful guys." Sam said squeezing my hand back and smiled when she did.

"Well there had to be one guy she dated that you liked."

"There was one guy that I liked, but he left my mom for Jennifer, the waitress at Applebee's. His name was Charlie, he was a fire man, the cool kind with a damnation and everything, but he didn't turn out as my hero who saved me from the fire." Sam said simply, she smiled until she mentioned Jennifer's name.

"I have an Aunt Jennifer, and an Uncle Charlie who happens to be a fire man." I said nervously. "I have a picture of him on my phone if you want to see if it is him." I said pulling out my cell, I sadly had to let go of her soft hand. "Here," I said showing her a picture of my Aunt Jennifer and Uncle Charlie.  
"Yep, that's the two timing man whore." She said running off.

"Sam! Sam, they got married like five years ago, I was like ten!" I called after her running to try to catch up to her. I finally got her and grabbed her by the arm. "Sam, I just wanted to know if you wanted to see him again, maybe Charlie and your mom didn't get along, but that doesn't mean you two can't." She just hugged me tightly and just wrapped my arms around her and returned that hug.

"Freddie? Can I see him again?" She asked.

"Sure Princess Puckett." I said back and broke the hug, but I pulled her into a kiss.

Sam's POV

Wow.

**Did U LIKE IT? That was one of my favs to write. I will update iwatch glee when glee comes back on, and I will take Kayleigh01's advice and do one like that for Sonny with a Chance.**


	6. Contest

**Some of you may be disappointed that it's not a new chapter, but I don't want to continue this story anymore, I will still keep it up and there will be a warning in the summary once I decide who will continue writing the story that's where to go. I will be having a contest.**

**Here are the rules. **

**It should head back in the right direction; I started to make it cheesier than it needs to be for a humor story. **

**SO to win you have to PM me what you think the next chapter should look like. **

**You could make it bumped up to M as long as it's not too bad. If you do choose to bump it up to M it shouldn't be anything more than a sex scene but like I wrote, not too bad.**

**It has to continue to be seddie. I just don't want to take any chances. **


End file.
